Anything but being a Ninja
by Foy the Snooze Button
Summary: He hates violence, he hates fighting and he hates death. He only has one ambition and that is to be anything but a ninja.
1. Chapter 1

**Just like in my other stories, I advise you all to keep an open mind as your reading this.**

 **So, the law (I think) demands I state I don't own Naruto and all in the Narutoverse, but I'm not in the mood… (*hears a lawyer coughing*)… to not listen to what the law demands!**

 **I DO NOT OWN NARUTO!**

 **There! Are you happy!? (*lawyers talk amongst themselves and wave for armed guards to stand down*) thank you! What's up with these dudes? Well, forget about my brush in with virtual lawyers and their HEAVILY armed dudes and read this story!**

 **Note: Naruto is the same age as canon.**

 **I now present (*drum rolls*) 'Anything but a Ninja'!**

CHAPTER 1

An eight year old child sat smartly in a large room; his eyes were slowly scanning through a small textbook on his desk. The boy wore a long sleeved black shirt with brown shorts that stopped at his knees, he was barefoot. The place he was reading in was surrounded with books stacked up high in tall shelves and book cases. The room was designed in a way that the shelves were aligned in concentric circles (like the rinnegan) and the reading areas were at the edges and in the middle of the shelves. The place he was reading in was the Namikaze-Uzumaki clan library.

This peculiar eight year old was Namikaze Naruto. He had pale blonde and the deepest pair of blue eyes outside observers would ever testify they had ever seen sans with the rest of his family although it was more of a dull shade of blue. He nodded to himself and turned a page, "hello, Tou-sama," he didn't lift his eyes to look at his birth father, Minato Namikaze, Yondaime Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato.

The man was where Naruto got all his looks from and arguably where he got his brains from as well. Minato crossed his arms and tried to smile but it came out as a wince, "how many times have I told you to stop calling me 'master'?"

Naruto shrugged but kept on actively reading, "I won't stop calling you 'Tou-sama', Tou-sama,"

The blonde Hokage sighed in defeat and smoothly sat down beside his son, "why aren't you training with your siblings, kid?"

"I've told you; I don't want to be a ninja," he turned another page and from what his father could see he was reading cloth making, "why can't you accept that,"

"You're too young to know what you want. Don't you want to protect your home like Mito, Tenzo and Hina?"

"I've read in 'The Fire Country: Myths.' by Butatu Yumji that one doesn't need to be a ninja to protect his home,"

Minato paused and nodded slowly, conceding to that point, "then what do you want to be?"

"if you listened to me, even once, you wouldn't need to ask," Naruto closed the book and stood up, he walked to a book shelf and trailed his fingers on the books spines, he stopped and slide the thin book he was reading into what seemed to be a random spot between two other books. He hummed to himself, masterfully ignoring his father in favour of sauntering to another shelf and plucking another book out. When he turned back to the table he was reading at he was genuinely surprised that his father was still there.

"If you at least spent a bit of time with your family and not be gallivanting around the village or holed up in a library then I would have known,"

"You know very well that I have not too much in common with this family, Tou-sama. Plus its either your all training somewhere or eating," he walked to the table but this time he sat across from his father, the book he was reading was about the mechanics behind some inventions that couldn't be made finished,

"We also go to the park, visiting other families, among other things," Minato sat back in his chair and propped his feet on the table, "do you even know that your mother is pregnant,"

"longer than you," the boy flicked idly through the book, he then pulled out a small note book from his sleeve and a pen, he flicked it open and was comparing what he had written to what was in the text book, again he was ignoring his father who was open mouthed, "it was obvious, the way she would always run off to the bathroom in the morning, how Tsunade-obaa-sama and Mikoto-sama would always be giggling when they 'hang out'" the boy jotted down something most would consider a mixture of gibberish and gobbledegook, "oh and let's not forget the pregnancy tests she drops in the dust bin with her beauty magazines when she thinks no one's around," he allowed a longing sigh to escape his pale lips, "it makes me wonder if I'm some kind of phantom that no one notices I'm right _there_ or something,"

"It's just that you're so _quiet_ , that's a good quality a ninja should have,"

"And we're back to me being a ninja. I'm not going to be one and you can't force me to be,"

"Oh? And why not?"

"there's this proverb Hashirama-sama wrote in 'Life's Tree', he said 'you can take a horse to water but you can't make him drink'" Naruto looked up at his father and smirked fractionally, "do you want to risk your own son being a ninja when he has made it clear that he doesn't want to be one? He could get killed on his first C rank mission," he looked back down and smiled into his book before he jotted down another fact no one would acknowledge.

Meanwhile, Minato sighed in defeat and rose to his feet, "fine, you can be what you want to be. Speaking of which, what _do_ you want to be?"

The blonde child paused in his frantic scribbling's and looked up at his father, "I want to be a lot of things," he coughed into his hands and looked away, "I want to be an author, a tailor, an inventor, an explorer, a diplomat," he smiled brightly, "I want to be everything besides being a ninja," the Hokage nodded slowly and walked out of the library. Naruto sat back in his chair and contemplated whether or not it would be a waste of time coming to dinner that evening.

"Drop that book Sochi; we're having dinner," he chose to go but he went with his own entertainment. Now though he knew he would be in a whole world of trouble if he didn't comply with what his mother had commanded him to do so he set a book mark in his book about the hidden sand and set it down on his lap. Normalcy returned not too long after this, "so, what have you been up to, Naruto-chan?" the red haired Uzumaki delicately tore into her roasted fish, "you weren't at training,"

"I was in the library, kaa-sama," the blonde boy answered flippantly as he too took a small bite of his fish and scrunched up his face lightly, "needs more fire," he murmured to himself as he reached for the pepper shaker and sprinkled a bit onto the fish, he took another bite and nodded in satisfaction, "I'm sure Tou-sama has informed you on why I wasn't there as well as why I haven't been attending,"

"He has but I don't understand why you don't want to be a ninja,"

"I don't like fighting, I don't like violence, and I don't like death, so I don't want to be a ninja,"

The youngest Namikaze, Hina, a fiery red haired girl of 6 years old watched her brother with pure, unadulterated admiration as she idly stuck some fish into her mouth, even going as far as to add in a bit of pepper, not too much though. The oldest child, Tenzo, was 10 years old and most of konoha's occupants confused him as Naruto's twin albeit he had whiskers symbolizing him as one half of the Kyuubi's container while his younger twin, Mito, had the other though she had red hair. Mito favoured cutting it short so it spiked up wildly.

"That's good and all but you don't have to be a ninja and fight, you can be a hospital medic or and academy attendant. Minato tells me that you have enough knowledge to teach the newer academy students and enough medical knowhow to treat most burns and abrasions'. I'm sure Tsunade would be glad to take you under her wings,"

The boy she was talking to was half listening; he was busy playing footsies with little Hina, "I can be a doctor but I will not be a medic nin, as well as I can be a teacher but not a ninja academy teacher," he frowned at his parents, "why can't you two be happy about my choices?"

The blonde father coughed lightly, "we don't understand why you don't want to be one. Most civilian children wish to be ninjas when their older, heck most children want to be ninjas,"

The boy frowned slightly and stopped playing with his sister, "I'm not most children,"

"Tou-chan, kaa-chan, if Naru doesn't want to be a ninja then he doesn't want to be a ninja. Please leave him be," Mito asked as she lightly glared at her parents,

Naruto though had lost his appetite so he stood up and bowed to both elders before he picked his plate up and walked to the kitchen, not once uttering a word. When he was sure they couldn't see him he set his plate down in the sink, his hands shaking, and rushed out of the back door. It was about 2 hours after sunset so the streets weren't too empty or too harsh so he sped through it in what most would consider a random direction. He knew his father already had his ANBU tail him so he was sure he could lose them. He slinked into an alley, slipped into an open baker's door and clambered out of a window just in time; a cat masked ninja entered in and wrongly deduced he ran out of the other door.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and lowered his head as he stalked through the small crowd, one destination in mind: The Nara Clan Compound. The guard's at the compounds gate didn't even have to ask for his identification; his pale blonde hair and the Namikaze clan symbol on his chest signalled who he was. The boy walked down the empty path and stopped in front of a door. He raised his still shaking hands and hesitantly, quietly, knocked on the door. He waited for about three minutes before someone answered. The Nara woman looked down and beamed at him, the smile diminished when the child didn't return the favour. She opened the door and he mutely entered, she then closed the door.

Her house was a humble place with humble furniture and humble decorations. It was a three roomed apartment that Naruto knew was fully stocked in case she ever had a visitor. He quietly walked to her dining room and sat down in a chair.

The woman though looked at him worriedly from behind her black rimmed glasses, "what's up with you?" she had jet black hair that was tied up in a messy pony tail and a healthy tanned skin. She was in her pyjamas; she had baggy black pants and a black vest shirt with her clan symbol on the chest, she also wore a long sleeping robe that was a deep red and dotted with her clan symbols.

"My parents," the woman sighed tiredly and sat down beside him, "they're still not happy I'm don't want to be a ninja. What do I do Yuma-chan; I'm not sure how much more I can take," the woman looked to be in her late teens, and none of her natural beauty hidden behind cosmetics.

The woman called Yuma pulled the boy into a hug, "keep doing what you've been doing," Naruto nodded into her chest and held her tightly, "are you hungry; I'm making my famous chicken ball sandwich,"

Naruto giggled quietly, "It's not famous if you're the only one that knows it, Yuma-chan,"

Yuma poked his side, eliciting another giggle and a small squirm, "hey, _you_ know it," she pushed him away and put her hands on her hips, "now are you hungry or not?" Naruto grinned and nodded. She stood up and walked smoothly into the kitchen while Naruto walked to a section of her living room that had books stacked to the ceiling, "the library is getting a fresh shipment of insecticides this weekend," he heard the woman yell from the and a curious sizzling sound, "are you going to help spray the place down?"

"Sure," he plucked a book out and skimmed through it, he then dropped it back, "what about my custom orders?"

"The boss said there was a delay. Something about a broken wheel and dead horses," she came back into the room but this time she was holding a large plate that was filled with her 'famous' chicken ball sandwich (not sure if it's a real thing but in here it damn well is) so high it obscured her face. She proudly dropped it on a table, "dinner is served,"

Naruto hurriedly scampered to the table and began eating, fast, like Yuma. It was like watching two wind deities fighting in their home turf. It escalated so much that Naruto picked the plate up and ran into her corridor, straight for her room, while the woman yelled mild profanities and chased after him. Luckily for the boy he cracked open the door and handed the woman half a sandwich though she yanked his whole body out and sat on him while she finished up the sandwiches on the plate. Naruto pouted, "No fair!" he considered it a great mystery that the 19 year old petite woman could effectively hold him down even though she had never had any konouchi training.

"All's fair when it comes to food," she sighed and patted her belly, "I'm stuffed,"

"Yeah, can you get off me now?!"

"Oh! You're still down there? I completely forgot," she took her sweet time to get up and hoist him back to his feet. Yuma waved to him, "good night," and she closed her door.

"…tub of lard," Naruto grumbled-more like whispered.

"I heard that!"

"I know!"

"I bet you can't say it to my face, chump!"

"Go get your beauty sleep, you shrivelled hag!" he squeaked and ran into his room, promptly locking it as the woman jumped out of her room.

"say it to my face, pipsqueak!" she banged her fists angrily on his door, occasionally giving it a kick, "I'll have you know I'm in the top 5 best looking Nara woman for the third time this year!" she threw her shoulders into the door and winced when it didn't budge while at the same time cursing the fact that it was made up of _really_ solid wood, "what?! You scared?!" Naruto giggled into his hand, "I can hear you laughing, short stack!" half an hour later of futile banging on solid wood without any ninja training to use her chakra, Yuma huffed and stomped back into her room to sleep, "see you tomorrow, buddy boy!"

Despite his happy mood, Naruto wasn't able to get a wink of sleep that night and for good reason too; Nara women were reputed for their fiery tempers almost as much as the half extinct Uzumaki clan members.

The next day, after sneaking past a very irritated Yumi, we find Naruto strolling towards the merchant district in the village, he slowed down when he caught sight of caravans making a circle with some of the foreign traders chatting in the caravan-made circle, "hey guys!" he waved to them.

One of the average looking merchants paused half way as he sipped his sake and turned to where he heard the awfully familiar voice, when he saw who had spoken he broke out in a grin and waved for his fellow merchants to look, "well look who we have here, its Naruto-cool!" the whole gathering of traders cheered and raised their cups at the now bashful blonde nine year old. Naruto blushed heavily and scratched the back of his neck as he shuffled to the closest seat which was beside the man who had introduced him, he lifted himself into the tall stool and a cup of apple juice was presented to him by a smiling woman, "so, to what do we owe the pleasure of your visit, Master Naruto-cool?"

'Naruto-cool' shyly sipped his beverage and looked over the rim at the other merchants who were now aptly observing him, "come on guys! Can't I just visit you lot?"

"Aye, aye, laddie you can," an eye patch wearing fabric seller from Kiri said loudly to the collective agreement of his comrades. The old man waved for another cup of sake and began sipping it again,

"So what's new with you, yo?" a very young man from the other side of the make shift bar table yelled to the blonde child. Naruto grinned and waved at him from behind his cup,

"Nothing really. I just came before you had to go back to your villages,"

The woman bartender reached over the table and squeezed his cheeks motherly, "isn't that cute?" Naruto pulled away from her hands and puffed out his cheeks in defiance, the men and women had a round of laughter at his behaviour, the woman gently placed her elbows onto the table and propped her head on her hands, "how's your school stuff doing, cool guy?"

It wouldn't come as a surprise to the citizens of Konoha that the Yondaime's quiet but at the same time very social son that said son was very familiar with foreign merchants. Since one of Naruto's ambitions was to be a traveller he often frequented the trading caravans to hear the bucket loads of stories the traders had to tell. On some days these traders chose to bring their own children along to Konoha but it was mostly on eventful days like 'The Kyuubi Festival'.

One of the teachings his parents had embedded in his subconscious mind was that to be strong one needed a precious person to protect to be strong. Despite the fact that he had no desire to be a ninja or be in any violent path of life there were numerous ways to protect someone precious without injuring or taking another person's life.

These humble foreigners were one of his precious people. Each and every one of them. Even their absent children. He could proudly profess that he loved them; they were his family without the ties of blood connecting him to them. When he first came, he was about six; they had been immediately drawn into the boy's exuberance to learn everything that could come out of their mouths. It brought them warm inside, even the battle hardened eye patch wearing trader, to see the young Yondaime's son sit with them and declare them as his friends.

As of the present, the boy was fiddling with his cup, "well, my parents don't know it-I think-but I'm almost through junior civilian school. My sensei told me that I need four more years before I'm specially permitted to sign up for the senior civilian school,"

The eye patch wearing man perked up when he heard the boy, "you're smart; why can't you graduate earlier?"

"I'm not exactly a genius, Shinzo-Ji-san, and I want to spend as much time as possible with my age mates,"

"Smart move, kid," The youngest merchant, 17 years old, said as he raised his cup to the boy, "and give yourself some credit; you're too smart for your age,"

"Thank you, Aoba-san," his response was a smile and a nod. Naruto meekly slide his cup to the woman bartender to refill it and she gladly did so, and returned to her former position, "by the way, how's Gigi feeling?"

"She's fine; it was just a stomach bug. She told me to say 'hi' by the way," the teen named Aoba said.

He stayed until an hour before midnight and the kind ex-mariner, Shinzo, escorted the boy back to the Kage's mansion. Naruto, expertly, snuck past the fuinjutsu defences (mainly because he was a blood relative of the two seal masters that drew them) and slipped into his room. He was met with the sight of his younger sister, Hina, snuggled in his bed, sleeping soundly. The boy didn't have the heart to kick the little girl out of his room so he tip toed to his bed and tucked her in with his blanket, dropping the kid's story book she had been reading on his desk.

He then tip toed to his ward robe and removed a sleeping bag, he rolled it by his bed, in case his sister got worried and was looking for him, and tucked himself in for the night.

"Goodnight, Imouto," he whispered, knowing from the way the very sensitive girl shifted on the bed that she was slightly awake and aware of his presence.

Hina looked over the edge of her brothers bed and smiled tiredly, "good night big bro," she said with a cute yawn, she let her hands fall off the bed and hold his shoulder, Naruto slipped a hand out and grabbed the limb, "see you tomorrow,"

"Yeah, see you tomorrow,"

 **Authors note**

 **Technically this story doesn't have an end, realistically speaking. still though, let me know what you think and on side note, if you guys have any suggestions about the name (like if its good as it is or you think you have a better one) then send it over PM or review.**

 **Hope you like it!**

 **Review!**

 **B.j.**


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

"I want you all to read about milk production in goats, write the clear summary down and submit it in our next class," the sensei of class 5G said over the din of his students chattering and gathering their books from their desks, despite the mild noise he was clear and they all paused to hear the rest of what he wanted to say, it wasn't anything they didn't know but they still listened and jotted it down anyway. Basic science was a core subject that all junior civilian students had to know before they could graduate to senior civilian school. The man was one of the best teacher the school could provide and he taught them very well, if his clean records were anything to go by.

The school was organized in a way that a class had two types of teachers each: one to take up science subjects and one to take up art subjects. The school was very wide and a lot of people applied for teaching posts there so no class was ever deficient. In total, in the junior section, there were 6 classes with 7 lettered subdivisions under them. The senior had 9 classes with three lettered sub-divisions in the first 6 classes while the last 3 were collage classes.

The man was a middle aged man with jet black hair and mild shadows under his eyes, the shadows weren't because of being tired, they were just part of him, the man though was very pale since he spent most of his time inside. He wore dark blue slacks and a buttoned up back suit shirt that was folded at the sleeves to his elbows. He had on wire rimmed glasses perched safely at his nose and a pen hooked on his.

The 9 year old students were marching out of the class in their friend groups and he caught sight of a particular group the Yondaime's son was in. They were 5 in total, three girls and two boys. He smiled when the blonde looked over at him as he was animatedly talking about _something_ ; his friends were raptly paying attention, and waved at his teacher. The man motioned for him to come over and Naruto apologised to his friends and bid them goodbye as he walked purposefully to the teacher.

"See you guys tomorrow!"

"Yeah, see ya dude!" one of the girls waved and pranced out of the room with the others.

Naruto turned back to his teacher, "is there something wrong, Ao-sensei?"

The man named Ao turned back to his desk and picked up his side bag, a present from the former class that had graduated, and grabbed Naruto's shoulder, leading him out of the class and closing the door, "there isn't a problem, well, not that much of a problem," he patted the boys head to calm him down, "I just came to remind you that tomorrow, during art class, we're having a bring your parents to school day to show case what you've all done in your classes art class,"

Naruto's shoulders sagged when he finally got what the man was trying to say, "Oh…"

Ao nodded and continued, "I want to say that, since your parents are high officials then you won't be blamed if they can't come," he seriously felt sorry for the smart child; he had met all his students parents, from the present till when he had just started teaching 10 years ago, for their annual students reports and no one came for Naruto's. It wasn't the first time a student of his had very important parents but those parents actually showed up once in a while. He had had the intuition to personally hand Naruto's grade reports to the Hokage at his office and what he saw greatly disappointed him. The man, though outwardly nodding at whatever he said, wasn't happy with what he was hearing and at the end of it all Minato would press him to discourage his son from attending that school and choose the Ninja Academy.

Naruto had too much potential as a civilian to be thrust into something he didn't want to be. Last week Naruto had separated two fighters in the hall way, both fighters were in grades above his own and after doing so he went into a short lecture on what arguing could do to a person, adding in the example of the Aburame clan and the Kamizuru clan of Iwa.

Naruto was a natural at dissolving arguments. Sadly his parents didn't see that.

"I'll-I'll try and see if they can come," the blonde boy murmured,

"don't feel bad; if they won't come then I'm sure one of your older friends can stand in their place…again," Naruto perked up and scrubbed the tears out of his eyes after hearing this. Both were now outside and Naruto looked at the suns position: two hours after midday, he said goodbye to his thoughtful teacher and walked back to the Kage's mansion, his camo green back pack securely on his back. The bag was a gift from a river country trader on his birthday, the man had said it was in style and who was Naruto to turn down such a thoughtful gift? He stopped over at a tea shop beside the mansion and ordered two boxes of assorted cupcakes to go. After doing this he walked past the gate and entered the house.

"I'm back!" his mother, who was reading a pregnancy magazine in the living room smiled and waved at him, he wanly smiled back and headed to his room,

"How was school?" she settled better in her chair, her bulging belly clearly visible.

"It was ok," he contemplated asking if she could come to school with him the next day for the art exhibit but discarded it, choosing to wait until his father and mother were together. He walked past his older sibling's room and stopped at his younger sister's room, the door had red and yellow sparkles over a hand written sign of her name. He knocked on the door and little Hina answered not too long after, she grinned, "Are you ready?"

She nodded, "are you?"

"I just need to drop my bag," he opened his door, directly opposite his own, and threw his bag onto his bed, the cupcakes were still in his hand, "now I'm ready," he gave the girl the boxes of cupcakes and they walked down the stairs to the front door.

"Where are you two going?" his mother asked from behind her magazine,

"Big bro said he'd take me to Akiko-chan's birthday party,"

' _That was today?'_ the red haired mother mused, she ran through a list of excuses to give on why she couldn't go but it was her blonde son that saved her.

"You don't have to go," he ushered the excited girl outside, Hina wore a knee length short sleeved blood red dress with black and white striped tights and sleeves. The dress had black heart designs speckled over it with the hearts having cross bones behind and skeletal faces on them. She had on a black baseball cap that she had purposefully turned backwards and deep red boots that had black soles. She was delicately balancing the box of cupcakes one on hand and holding her brothers hand with the other.

Naruto a deep blue shirt with grey chain like designs crisscrossing his chest and black pants, he also favoured wearing boots but his were a deep red with white soles. In one hand he held his own blue baseball cap and in the other he held his little sisters free hand.

Hina looked up at him, "let's go!"

"We'll be back before dinner," he said to his mother and walked out of the door with his sister, fixed his cap on his head (correctly) and closed the door. The siblings walked away from their house and made idle discussion as they made their way into the residential section of Konoha, noticing the ANBU team that followed after them in the shadows. They stopped at a fairly large house. Naruto chuckled when he saw the curtains upstairs closing hastily and didn't bother knocking. The door swung open to reveal a white haired 6 year old girl in a short plain green dress and black sandals, the girl nervously glanced up at Naruto and quietly motioned for them to come in.

They stepped in and made their way to the living room, "happy birthday Akiko-chan!" Hina squealed and shoved the box to the girl. Akiko grinned at her and dropped the box on the table, hugging her fellow 6 year old immediately after doing so,

"Thank you; I thought you wouldn't come,"

Naruto relaxed in is chair across from the two and reclined, his legs over one of the chairs arms and his other half over the other arm. "We're early, Akiko-san,"

The white haired girl laughed nervously and scratched the back of her head, "I know, I know. Daddy and mommy are upstairs," on cue both of the girls walked briskly into the living room and blinked at the visitors. Naruto greeted the cordially and Hina waved jovially.

"Oh, hello Naruto-sama and Hina-sama. I believe you two are here for Akiko-chans birthday?" the duo nodded, "the other children will be here any minute now," also on cue they heard a polite knock on the door and the children's party was now underway.

Akiko Hibachi was an only child, Hina had befriended during the last Kyuubi festival. There was something about her that drew Hina in and both were now very good friends. Presently, the two, as well as all the other girls in the party, were off giggling in a corner of the house while the younger boys played amongst themselves. Naruto was in a group of older children that were forced by their parents to escort their younger siblings to the party. He was silently listening to a boy rant on how unfair it was to come instead of going to train. The boy and the other older children were in a world of their own, pretending to be the adults in the party and laughing boisterously at seemingly random things.

The party had everything one would expect in a fairly wealthy family with an only child, that child being 6 years old. There were party games like pin the tail on the donkey, twister, an eating contest between the birthday girl and a random person, among other things.

There was even an all-out dance contest. Little Hina had been shoved out into the dance circle along with Akiko and another female child, unfortunately (depends on how you look at it) the other child was an Akimichi (I bet you can predict who won). The generic child just so happened to be the most experienced in dancing; apparently his parents were dance instructors, he tore up the floor with dances no one was even sure were in existence. Akiko could only do the electric slide and that left Hina to do an awkward funky chicken. It was a moment Naruto was glad he took along a disposable camera and pockets filled with film; he took so many pictures it could cover a fence. There was cake, there were pies and, of course, after the two real adults stepped out for a minute, there was a mini-food fight.

Laughs were shared, memories made, company enjoyed.

Thirty minutes to dinner time and it was time for Naruto and Hina to go back home. He bade the birthday another happy birthday and left with his sister.

"That was awesome, big bro!" Hina squealed and swung up to Naruto's back, hollering for the boy to run, and who was Naruto to not comply. The child's happy yells could be heard from their point to the reclusive Aburame clan compound. Hina grabbed the blonde boy's uncontrollable hair and used it as a sort of horse rein and steering wheel, swerving around and dodging other people.

Naruto was busy making horse noises and galloping down the path to their house, grinning with the villagers. He burst through the Kage mansion doors and skidded to a stop a few feet from behind a couch chair, Hina flipped over him and landed in a lump on the chair. Naruto didn't give her time to get her bearings; he dived onto her and gave her a playful elbow drop, the girl squirmed from under him and climbed another chair beside the couch, Naruto acted as though he was dizzy, so Hina jumped with all her might (cue majestic white swan flying behind Hina) and flopped onto her brother. She picked up a couch pillow and hit the boy, Naruto pushed her off and took a pillow himself.

The war was epic…until…

"Ugh, can't you two behave?" Tenzo Namikaze snorted from the dining room, he was brushing an apple on his shirt, after doing so he propped his legs on the table and proceeded to start chomping down on it. His twin, Mito Namikaze, walked out of the kitchen with an orange, purposefully sucking on it, and sat down by her twin. She winked from above her orange at her younger siblings and went back to destroying the fruit.

"It's called fun, Mr Two-by-Four-Your-" Hina was cut off by a swift slap to the back of her head, courtesy of Naruto,

"Language," he shoved her away calmly when she attempted to jump on him, "is dinner ready?"

"Just about," Tenzo said, brushing another apple and chomping down on it, "kaa-san said three more minutes,"

"What are we having," Hina huffed, after another unsuccessful ambush,

Mito burped, ignoring her irritated brother, and also propped her feet on the table, "Ramen…" she said the food wistfully and hugged herself, giggling almost maniacally, "ramen," on cue, all her other siblings, even Naruto sighed longingly as the warm scent wafted into the room,

"ramen," all said the name with their eyes watery and their lips glistening, Hina swallowed thickly and Naruto, trying to regain composure, cleared his throat and made to say something but it only came out as a throaty gurgle, "ramen," any outsider that saw how all four children of Minato Namikaze, the Yondaime Hokage and Uzumaki Kushina, his wife, saying the name of the noodle in sync and with the same expression, it would be considered the strangest thing since Uchiha Fugaku fainted after hearing Mikoto Uchiha, his wife, was pregnant for Sasuke. All the couples friends openly said that this was what would happen if two ramen lovers (*cough-worshippers-cough*) procreated together.

"Dinners ready!" the children cleared their throats, also in sync, and righted their positions, Naruto and Hina walked to the table and took a seat. The door to the kitchen slammed open dramatically and Kushina swished out, wearing her home clothes but this time in immaculate white, holding a large pot of ramen over her head. Naruto allowed himself a brief break from drooling to look over at his fathers appointed chair at the head of the table, not in the least surprised the man was already there, he didn't bother asking how he got there so fast and so quietly. He went back to raptly watching their mother neatly serve the food around and raising her hands for them to begin eating.

It was a terrible amount of self-control that the Hokage's children didn't break their bowls in the name of eating their favourite dish. Add in the fact that in one of their mothers hands was a _thick_ wooden spoon and the other held her chop sticks. Minato stifled a moan, _uncomfortably_ in sync with the rest of his family, "this ramen…" he swallowed down another serving, "is _beautiful_ , Kushi-chan,"

The woman blushed bashfully and lightly kicked Naruto's leg, one non-verbal passed (can you guess what it is?) if the fact that Minato sat up straighter then the message was _very_ good. She couldn't speak; she had some food in her mouth, but she did wink at him.

"Ugh, can't you two not flirt in front of us?" the ever smooth Tenzo said from beside Mito, "I _swear_ , you two are like a couple of school kids,"

"I think it's cute," Hina squeaked and tucked in for another long swallow of ramen, stifling a giggle when Mito winked at her,

Naruto rolled his eyes and took another serving of ramen from the seemingly bottom-less pot of food, Kushina too rolled her eyes at her children, "how was the birthday party, Hina-chan?"

The youngest soon to-be fourth born began jumping in her seat, "it was epic, kaa-chan! I was in this dance contest and I was winning!" Naruto snorted a laugh, choking on his ramen broth, when the choking subsided he looked at Hina pointedly, the girl just grinned, shaking her head frantically,

"You were winning?" Mito said, already knowing what Naruto had choked about. The youngest blonde shook his head and swiftly brought out a picture from his pants pocket, passing it to Mito before Hina could snatch t away. Mito laughed loudly and leaned the picture to Tenzo, who also couldn't resist a loud laugh. The picture was passed to their parents and the two also laughed loudly. It was inevitable that the picture got to Hina, her family laughing shamelessly. It was one of the various he had of her, flapping her arms shyly and eying the real dancer, who was at the background spinning on his back, and Akiko also shyly waving her arms in a fractured version of the legendary dance, The Electric Slide. The crowd was clapping to the beat, even the older kids.

The poor girl turned a deep flustered red, idly using her chop sticks to mix her noodles, "it wasn't _that_ bad,"

"Oh yeah?" Naruto said beside her, he waggled his eyebrows and made to take another picture out but his shoulder was punched by an increasingly bashful Hina, "ok, ok," he leaned into Mito, who was recovering from her hearty laugh, "I'll show you later," he winced again when Hina punched him. the mood settled down and Naruto swallowed nervously, "Tou-sama, kaa-sama," he took their muffled sighs as a good ahead to speak, "my school is holding a bring your teacher to school day tomorrow, they're going to show off my grades art," both his parents nodded in understanding, "I was wondering-I was wondering if either of you could come"

"I'm sorry Naruto but I'm busy tomorrow," Minato winced when his son didn't even seem disappointed, only opting to nod and look over at his mother,

"Mikoto-chan, Tsunade-chan and I were planning to go shopping for baby clothes tomorrow, I'm sorry Sochi-kun,"

Visibly, Naruto was a perfect picture of emotionless, but it was very noticeable how his eyes fell, "oh…I understand,"

Kushina was scrambling for what to say, "but-but we promise to go next time!"

Naruto looked away from her, "like you promised last year? And the year before that?" bringing an adult to the art exhibit wasn't compulsory in any way, it was just a good feeling that a child's parents saw what their ward had been up to in their art classes. Naruto, despite being rejected for flimsy excuses every year he asked, was always disappointed by their replies.

His parents didn't have the heart to answer and the air thickened. Finally, Naruto couldn't take it anymore and he stood up and carried his plate to the kitchen. He again escaped and slept at the Nara librarian's house. Back at the table, the twins and Hina were silently glaring at their parents; they too took their plates away and went to bed.

 **Authors note**

 **Pretty sad.**

 **On a side note, I grew up with most of my female friends being tom boys and my sisters too being tom boys, so I don't exactly know how to depict a girly girl. If you don't like it then sucks for you. Also note I'm into yuri (not yaoi! Never yaoi!) but I can't write it. Nope. And I definitely can't write a harem or an incest fic.**

 **So Naruto isn't going to be paired with Hina. They share a very good relationship but they wouldn't be a couple. Final.**

 **If anyone has any idea for the next chapter or any future chapter then you're free to review or send me a PM. Heck, any question, send it over!**

 **What do you think? I want to know if what I wrote was a total waste of time or a passable story. I don't want to sound selfish but I feed on your reviews! Figuratively of course.**

 **Review!**

 **B.j.**


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